Author Archives: jahoodie

Poptart Change Chat

Name Equals Jess: yo the island is traveling through time now
Name Equals Jess: cause someone turned a big wheel
Name Equals Jess: inside the core of the island
Name Equals Jess: everyone is getting nose bleeds
damar86: there was a movie with ashton kutcher like that
Name Equals Jess: the nose bleeds?
damar86: yeah, and the island
damar86: no not really
Name Equals Jess: no were you talking about the butterfly effect
damar86: yes but i didn’t have the effort to keep going
Name Equals Jess: so they have single packs of pop tarts now
damar86: what took them so long really
Name Equals Jess: like, the actual serving
Name Equals Jess: which is good cause it makes me feel a lot o less guilty
damar86: come to think of it, i never really felt up to eating 2 poptarts anyway
Name Equals Jess: i feel good about this change

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Dogfish Breweries and the American Beer

beer1
Sorry, this was way too difficult to shoot for another beer .gif

Just finished reading a stupendous article from the New Yorker about Sam Calagione, founder of Dogfish Breweries and maker of “extreme” beers. I recommend it for home brewers and beers snobs alike, as it touches on things like his thought process for inventing new beers or even re-inventing old ones from ancient texts and chemical analysis of petrified tomb hooch. It also has a fair bit about the history of brewing in the US, and why we’re getting the micro brew boom today.

My favorite two ideas in the somewhat lengthy and culturally through article (it is the New Yorker, don’t forget) :

1) American macro beer lost its flavor around the turn of the century because the generational palate had grown up on cheap sweats and coca cola and didn’t like bitter, among other reasons.

2)Beer is brewed, wine is made; Wine can happen naturally if you leave out juice and is expected to vary from vintage to vintage , but beer is coaxed into being through elaborate man-developed processes and precise science to be the same again and again.

Read the article here.

Bourbon BBQ Update

Garbage plate in all its glory, with a side of fries and chili mac.

From our interweb traffic statistic pages, it seems like our Bourbon BBQ review is quite a popular read. The other week when my friends wanted to take a White Castle run, I convinced them what they really wanted instead was a pile of chared meat with pickled onions and hot sauce.

Bourbon is still holds all of its wood-panled, checkered table cloth, paper towels instead of napkins charm (as well as apparently adding free wi-fi for whatever reason), but the prices have seen a slight bump up. Understandable in an era of rising food prices and still keeps them within the range of cheap, good food. I paid 2-3 dollars more for the wonderful garbage plate then I did when the review was written last year, but just took more advantage of the free refills of RC cola to make up for it. Something about the sweet cola tang of RC cola that makes the spicy beef go down.

Shots for Bordem: The Train Simulation

I’m going to start out by saying you shouldn’t do this. It was a bad idea, influenced by beer and severe bordem, that shouldn’t be repeated unless you desire punishment. Or maybe some excitment.

My roommates and I had a habit of trying to find the worst possible youtube videos, and one day we stumbled upon real-time screen cap videos of people playing Microsoft Train Simulator. With no added sound. Why would anyone want to watch this crap? Oooo cool, he pulled into the side track to let the freight train go by… for 5 minutes. This deserved its own drink:

1 part Kahluha for the track
1 part Vodka for the fuel
1 part chocolate whey protein body-building powder for the gravel

Shake over ice, drink immediately before it congeals/settles/turns.

Imagine taking shots of sickly sweet chocolate sand, and you’ll understand why you should/should not do this. Toot Toot.

Holiday Cross-Over

Something about this just tickles my ironic funny bone… the idea of haunted gingerbread houses! I’d be a fun thing to do at a party, and it’s easier to find massive amounts of small candy for cheap this time of year. Plus there is something sexy about the browns of gingerbread decorated with blacks and oranges.  Hit up google image search for some ideas, but I first saw haunted gingerbread mansions here.

Weak Will and Natural Disasters

Photo courtesy of tacobell.com

It’s well established that I can’t pass up novelty food items. Lately I’ve been passing it off as “research” for “food journalism”, but that doesn’t explain my recent encounter at Taco Bell. I had already eaten a huge breakfast (buckwheat soba noodles in a spicy chicken broth… as hangover cure “research”) and was on my way home with a car full of people that wanted to stop for fast food. At the drive through,  I saw the sign for THE VOLCANO TACO. OMG. That thing was so spicy they died the shell neon red. I pointed at it and said something along the lines of, “I need that NOW.”

Truth is, I really didn’t need it. I was monumentally disappointed- it was not nearly hot enough to be called a VOLCANO, or even just a volcano. I’ve had mild at thai resturants that were spicier than this. The taco was basically a normal one, with a cheese sauce that tasted like they had poured a couple packets of Fire Sauce in. The shell was slightly sweeter than normal, which was a good contrast and doused the inital spicy heat enough to turn it into a lingering background burn.

Bottom Line: Better than the default taco bell taco, but not VOLCANO (TM) good. 3/10

Brush your teeth like a rockstar

I can’t turn down novel liquor. I suppose one could have a worse vice, but I impulse buy the strange dusty stuff on the back of the shelves all the time. Dr. McGilligcuddy’s Mentholmint Schnapps has ended up in my hands on several occasions because of the old thyme style label of a man with a dog but never made it to the checkout counter because of a fear I had; namely the fear that a whole 750mL would go to waste. My spendthrift ways of not wasting food would kick in if this stuff was minty rubbing alcohol and I’d be stuck with a semi expensive bottle of 1800s cure all snake oil. When I saw an airline bottle I finally gave in to the mystery.

To solve this one for you- it’s really really good, as long as you like a fresh mint kick. I was expecting something along the lines of toothpaste and got a fresh and exciting dose of menthol that lingers in the mouth and throat. It perked me up and made my throat feel fresh and tingly in the same vein as an Altoid. It’s sweet and slightly viscous, and makes a fine post-rockstar-bender breath freshener/hair of the dog (if there is no Jack Daniels straight from the bottle laying around, that is).

Bottom Line: B+ for a lightly alcoholic, sweet, refreshing drink thats great on the rocks